You think we're dancing? ... That's all we've ever done.

 

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(diaryland) July 01, 2009 - 1:13 p.m.

Hi. These are my jobs:

  • Graduate architect. I'm not a real architect, technically, because you have to do a special exam like a bar exam over here. Not sure what it is like in other countries. In my experience, being an architect is nothing like how it is on the TV or in movies, where everybody seem to be architects and trying to design the quintessential building. The only time I've ever seen it portrayed accurately is on Hey Dad. I used to work from home. I did not get out of my pyjamas that year.

  • Piano teacher. I used to do this at school when I was doing my music degree, and I lost my voice at the end of every day. Now I just do it privately and it's the best. Even though now I'm teaching one person at a time, it can still be a lot like shepherding. I also teach one easily distracted kid with over 100 Bratz dolls how to play electric guitar.

  • Violin teacher. I do this for one hour per week in a primary school. It keeps me in touch with the diabolical schemes the middle-class under-twelves are up to these days. I have to break up a LOT of imaginary sword fights (using bows). Also, I have to tell children not to put too many spiderman stickers on their violins because it's bad for the varnish.

  • Graphic Designer. I made safety newsletters for the fire brigade and sometimes other stuff like posters. It involves putting important messages in really huge text onto pieces of glossy A4 in the vain hope that some firepeople will actually read it so they put their helmets in their trucks properly. They have a newsletter come out every month and I do it in front of the TV.

  • English Tutor. I tell one guy in Year 10 what to write in his exams. I really enjoy this job.

    Now that I've written all my simultaneous jobs out it doesn't seem that complex. It feels complex at the time - I'm always rushing off to get to my next place of employment. If I didn't have school holidays, I'd be wrecked.

    But this was all my idea in the first place. I didn't want to do the nine-to-five thing because my brain shuts down in the early afternoons and it doesn't recover until I get to do something else.

    I think that my ideal job would be something that I have complete control over. In architecture, you have to rely on other people and sometimes a massive problem won't get solved for a long time, and I lose sleep over things like that. When I feel powerless.

    I hope that when I'm 40, I'll do something completely different for a job.



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