(diaryland) January 23, 2015 - 10:44 a.m.

I looked down into the toilet.

There was something extra in there. At first, it confused me. Then, I realised. The money must have slipped out of my pocket.

I had just shat on a ten dollar note.

I grabbed it and washed it so hard it broke in half. I taped it back together again, went downstairs, and handed it over to the lady in the cafe.

Are there traces of fecal matter on the raisin toast she buttered? I don't know. I'm eating it now.